Success 103: Get To Changing

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Success 102: How To Start Your Own Success

Plans themselves don’t technically matter, but planning is vitally important

Plans are guaranteed to change multiple times along the way

However, through planning, you get a better grasp of what’s coming

Ask constant questions to discover yourself and where you want to be

We are often aware of things happening around us but don’t usually connect cause and effect

  • Practice brutal honesty with yourself
  • Risking making inaccurate connections about the world is better than not making any connections

Find a way to harness what you’re passionate about

  • Find where you want to go by following why you have your desires

Things you can naturally excel at are often indirectly related to what you already excel at

Look at the worst things in your life to find what to fix right away

  • The greatest fear you have
  • The most frequent shortcoming you think about
  • The worst part of your daily routine

Every great thing happens from an idea that doesn’t quite make sense to anyone else

  • Nothing worth having is risk-free
  • The bolder your most substantial goals are, the more likely they’ll be phenomenally successful
  • Taking deep ventures into new territory brings you to do things nobody else has done
  • At the same time, consider how your audacity will lead to being shunned
  • Look at your five closest friends, since you will likely have a similar lifestyle to a combination of them in five years

Pay attention to the Habit Loop to find what you’re missing

  1. Watch for triggers that automate your behaviors
  • 90% of the mind’s decisions are subconscious
  1. Observe your routine from that trigger
  • Track where you will often go with your habit
  1. Look at your expected reward for that habit and why you keep doing it
  • If the habit is a good one without a proper reward, brainstorm how you can make an award for it
  • If the habit is unhealthy, find out how to either remove the reward or create an award for not doing it
  • Try replacing satisfactory habits with better habits, since it’s easier to change habits than break them
    • Progress in small steps if you need (e.g., cigarettes to chewing tobacco to chewing gum)

Plan proper goals

Ask what you need to get to your goals

What do I need to create a good result?

What skills do I still need to make it work?

What resources am I missing right now to make it happen?

Out of all of this, what am I afraid of that is outside of my control?

With all of this in mind, what is my SWOT?

  • What STRENGTHS do I have?
  • What WEAKNESSES do I have?
  • What OPPORTUNITIES can I make?
  • What THREATS can happen?

Keep your goals small enough to attain within a short time and with few resources

Make plans for the final goal, then create sub-goals and sub-sub-goals

  • Sub-divide your goals down as far as you need

Effective goal-setting is always SMART:

  • Specific – the more specific, the better
  • Measurable – can be counted where you can track progress
  • Attainable – possible to do within your time frame
  • Realistic – if your goals are too big, you will always fail
  • Time-based – has a deadline where you’ll evaluate your progress

Sometimes you may need to focus on indirectly related goals toward your final purpose

  • e.g., to become a performer you may need to become more physically active, meaning going to the gym right now

Every goal will create change and discomfort

  • You should have a strong desire to change to your desired goal and not only fearful of risks from not changing
  • Discomfort from pursuing the goal should be less motivating than the pleasure you feel from succeeding

Make change and discomfort easier

Change is always uncomfortable

Every change will end opportunities and will also create a different opportunity

Most people are afraid of change and become inflexible to compensate, which renders them ineffective

If you can learn to enjoy or tolerate change, everything you endure becomes easier

Someone may think of your idea first, but they might not have your own qualities that you can add to it

Make others’ successes your own with the R2/A2 Formula

  1. Recognize the principle, technique or idea

  2. Relate the principle, technique or idea to a personal experience

  3. Assimilate it and make it a part of yourself

  4. Action it by following through and doing something with it to prove it to yourself

A Futures Wheel helps you anticipate changes

  1. Chart everything on a graph similar to this one:
  1. Identify the change you want to make

  2. Identify the immediate consequences that come from that change

  3. Identify the consequences that come off of those first consequences

  4. Analyze the implications of everything that could happen

  5. Identify immediate actions you can take to start the change

Successful change always has five parts

Vision – without vision any attempts will lead to confusion

Skills – a lack of skills will create tremendous amounts of anxiety

Resources – not enough resources will create frustration at limitations

Action Plan – no plan of attack will lead to many false starts that go nowhere

Incentive – no proper incentive will make the change take far too long

Some proven techniques make changing habits easier

The more you avoid telling anyone about your goals, the more likely you are to accomplish them

The brain’s chemical satisfaction from talking about a goal is just as prevalent as succeeding at it

However, if you need to tell anyone, tell them in a way that puts your excitement and happiness on the attaining of it

  • e.g., “I can’t wait to finish my book!” instead of “I’m writing a book right now.”

Incentive-Action-Reward always exists in any successful endeavor

  1. Use a current life pattern like sitting down at a desk or using the bathroom as a reminder for your new habit

  2. Design your habits with specific rules

  • Your new habit must be naturally easy
    • Ideally, a new habit should be more natural than your previous one
  • Make your habits specific to clarify whether you’ve done it
  • Create a reasonable deadline to follow up on your progress
  1. Create constant self-rewards for succeeding at your habits
  • Make small incentives to keep performing the habit
  • Many good habits have the reward already built into it
  1. After enough time mastering your habit you’ll receive enough reward from doing it that you won’t need external rewards

Success follows a predictable cycle

  1. Idea – inspiration or motivation to do something worthwhile

  2. Brainstorming – kicking around ways to fulfill the idea

  3. Planning – setting out a long-term goal and then a short-term goal

  4. Early preparation – getting into position as quickly as possible to carry out the plan

  5. Confidence – powering forward with the full desire to succeed

  6. Failure – a natural result of the trial-and-error nature of life

  7. Discouragement – a biological reaction to the unsatisfactory results

  8. Recovery – a natural state of rest and self-forgiveness following a prior failed effort that inspires and builds confidence

  9. Early preparation – getting into position as quickly as possible to carry out the plan again

  10. Confidence – powering forward with the same desire to succeed

  11. Failure – a natural result of the trial-and-error nature of life, but this time a bit better

  12. Discouragement

  13. (etc., etc.)

  14. Success – the fruit of hard work, research, rest, time, patience, and support from others

The cycle of success has some special guidelines

Steps 1-4 are “motion”, but Steps 5-8 are “action”

  • It’s easy to never move into the “action” steps
  • Many people don’t want to make the push because they don’t feel they’re ready
  • Most of the time, feeling unprepared is over-thinking and stalling the situation
  • If you’re in a “motion loop” start your actions with an immovable date

Never go back to the Planning stage from the Failure stage

  • Planning again should be done after the Recovery stage
  • Without Recovery, you will be too disoriented from any new failures
  • If you need to use extra energy, focus on ways you could have done better

Recovery is reconciling your past actions to hold yourself personally accountable

  • Manage your standards with a system
    1. Recognize your actions
    2. Own up to what you did and its consequences
    3. Genuinely forgive yourself
    4. Learn what you can do better next time
    5. Prepare to take action again
  • Not devoting time to Recovery creates a victim mentality loop that hinders success
    1. Ignoring or oblivious to any new input
    2. Denying realities that support that input
    3. Blaming and rationalizing any adverse consequences
    4. Resistance to any further pressure to change
    5. Thoughtless behavior across all spheres of life
      • Thoughtlessness can include unquestioningly accepting old input and losing self-awareness

The “finish line” of any success is also the “starting line” for another venture

Instead of aiming for your “finish line”, aim past it to ensure you cross it

Don’t try to “hurry it up” or “get it done” since it won’t fix all of your problems and will more likely discourage you

In fact, attaining your goal will often make your life more complicated

Pay close attention to what you consume

Eat healthily and exercise routinely

Observe the themes in the books, movies, and shows you enjoy

The start of success is more accessible than it appears

Succeeding at a habit is merely accomplishing one of the following

  1. Failing only slightly less than you do right now
  2. Mastering something straightforward
  3. Working out details about what you are already doing well enough

There are many examples of “easy success”

  • A small daily decision to work out intensely for two minutes can drastically reduce the risk of health issues
  • Eating 200 calories less every day while maintaining the same lifestyle will net losing 24 pounds over one year
  • The average MLB player’s batting average is about 28.3%, while the MLB Hall of Fame starts at 30.2%
  • Most popular music is the same 3-4 chords in varying orders

Twenty hours of intentional practice will make you reasonably good at anything

Deliberate practice is a formula

  1. Dissect the skill into very, very small pieces
  2. Learn enough to self-correct and self-edit as you practice
    • Get better at noticing your mistakes and changing things as you see them
    • Surround yourself with individuals who can teach you
  3. Remove any barriers to practicing
    • Ignore the smaller minutiae of your task while you’re still learning
    • If you need motivation, make an unrecoverable investment toward your goal like paying for a class or committing with a friend to going
  4. Practice at least twenty hours to get past the frustration barrier
    • The frustration barrier is where you feel stupid and incompetent when doing the task
    • Most people never get past the frustration paradox

Twenty hours becomes thirty minutes a day for forty days

  • It might take 10,000 hours of practice to become the best, but you won’t typically need that level of skill for what you want

The most challenging barrier to learning anything is emotional, not intellectual

Discipline yourself

Self-discipline is the process of removing things to make room for new things you desire

Self-discipline is the ability to control feelings and overcome weaknesses

  • No self-discipline guarantees you’ll be fat, lazy and unproductive
  • Self-discipline helps develop every attribute necessary for success
  • Even hobbies can create permanent results for a successful life
  • Pain from restraint and moderation is almost always worth it

Self-discipline is easy to understand, but hard to master

  1. Look at daily activities that inhibit success
  2. Remove those activities by choosing to no longer repeat them
  3. Plan to remove temptations that might trigger the action
  4. Practice a new routine in place of the old one
  5. Persist with the new routine until you no longer want the old one

Make self-discipline easier

Work on the goals one at a time, one step at a time

  • Splitting your focus makes success much, much more difficult

Learn how to improve your willpower

  • Willpower is the ability to perform against difficulties or when you don’t want to
    • Willpower is a competition with yourself over a decision
  • The simplest way to gain more willpower is often to spend more time visualizing your future reward for your current pain
  • Try to improve your confidence
    • Look at yourself in the eyes in the mirror and talk to yourself
    • Fake confidence, since it often tricks your mind into holding a genuine belief in yourself

Give incentives to yourself to make the new activities easier

Keep a journal or work diary

Welcome feedback whenever you can

  • Before you accept the feedback, consider who’s giving it to you

It’s challenging to make changes alone

  • Hold yourself accountable with others

Slow down and make more purposeful steps

  • Some people create a rushed environment to their benefit by implying you must make a hasty decision
  • You will often make your most significant life decisions within seconds

Take advantage of any available resources

All the rules of productivity apply to success

Use every single item you have to get to where you want

You may end up breaking the unspoken rules of society for your desire

Next: Success 104: How To Persevere