Health 104: Ailments

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Health 103: Having A Good Memory

There are many ailments connected simply to uncontrollable demographic factors

  • Age-related medical issues start appearing at certain ages
    • 20’s
      • Breast Cancer (female-specific)
      • High Cholesterol
      • Human Papilloma Virus (female-specific) – leading cause of cervical cancer
      • Melanoma (aka Skin Cancer)
      • Testicular Cancer (male-specific)
    • 30’s
      • Colorectal Cancer (male-specific)
      • Type 2 Diabetes
      • Heart Disease (male-specific)
      • Cervical Cancer (female-specific)
      • Breast Cancer (female-specific)
    • 40’s
      • Heart Disease
      • Prostate Cancer (male-specific)
      • Ovarian Cancer (female-specific)
    • 50s
      • Colon Cancer
      • Stroke
      • Osteoporosis (female-specific)
    • 60s
      • Less risk of Type 2 Diabetes, but sharply increased risk of Heart Disease and Cancers
      • Alzheimer’s Disease
      • Colorectal Cancer (female-specific)
  • Race-based medical issues are common to certain ethnic groups
    • African (Sub-Saharan)
      • Sickle-Cell Anemia
    • American (African-American)
      • Asthma
      • Diabetes
      • High Blood Pressure
      • Lung Cancer
    • American (Caribbean)
      • Mental Illness
      • Stroke
    • American (Latin)
      • Lactose Intolerance
      • Sickle-Cell Anemia
    • American (USA)
      • Stroke
    • American (Native)
      • Lactose Intolerance
    • Arab
      • Sickle-Cell Anemia
      • Stroke
    • Asian (South)
      • Diabetes
      • Heart Disease
    • European (Northern)
      • Cystic Fibrosis
      • Hereditary Hemochromatosis
      • Lactose Intolerance
    • European (Southern)
      • Sickle-Cell Anemia
      • Thalassemia
    • Indian
      • Lactose Intolerance
      • Sickle-Cell Anemia
    • Jews (Ashkenazi)
      • Lactose Intolerance
      • Tay-Sachs Disease

Make lifestyle changes to decrease health risks

  • Drink plenty of water to avoid or minimize most ailments
    • Bottled water isn’t necessarily healthier
    • Use your own activated charcoal water filter
  • Learn to breathe correctly by expanding your lungs all the way
  • Work on your posture to ensure you’re moving your body the correct way
    • Stretch more to improve your posture, which will also make you taller
  • Eating well can fix most health problems
    • Simply being overweight gives all of the following problems
      •  Psychological
        • Depression
        • Lowered Sex Drive
        • Obstructive Sleep Apnea (difficulty sleeping)
        • Anxiety
      • Physiological (Decreases Quality of Life)
        • Shortness of Breath
        • Low Metabolism
        • Type 2 Diabetes
        • Migraines
        • Polycistic Ovarian Syndrome (reproductive dysfunction)
        • Asthma
        • Acne
        • Psoriasis
        • Acid Reflux Disease
        • Urinary Incontinence
        • Joint Problems
        • Gout
        • Hypothyroidism, sometimes hyperthyroidism
      • Physiological (Life-Threatening)
        • Pseudotumor Cerebri (cranial pressure causing nausea, headache and vomiting)
        • Dyslipidemia Hypercholesterolemia (excess fat and cholesterol in the blood)
        • Heart Disease
        • Hepatitis
        • High Blood Pressure
        • Non-Alcoholic Fatty Liver Disease
        • Venous Stasis Disease (blood flow in extremeties is slowed)
        • Early Death
    • When possible, avoid a number of clearly unhealthy food products
      • Canned foods contain BPA
      • Processed meats often have growth hormones, antibiotics and veterinary drugs
      • Anything marketed as low-fat uses sugar to compensate for the flavor loss
      • Anything marketed as low-carbohydrate uses artificial sweeteners that are usually more unhealthy than natural ones
      • Margarine and vegetable oils have high amounts of trans fat
      • Pre-made foods like microwave popcorns and microwave dinners have many preservatives and unhealthy additives
      • Non-organic vegetables like potatoes and apples are known for high pesticide contamination
      • Any soy products that aren’t fermented, since they have a host of risks
      • Most fast food adds plenty of salt, fat and preservatives to their product compared to a store-bought alternative
    • When dining out, try to avoid some more dangerous food selections
      • Don’t take a waitress’ recommended dish, since it’s usually what the kitchen is trying to get rid of
      • At KFC, don’t eat the Pot Pie or Honey BBQ chicken sandwiches, since they use the leftover chicken from the previous day
    • Improve your diet by substituting healthier alternatives
      • Meals
        • Bread loaves replaced with pita bread
        • Potato chips replaced with popped popcorn
        • Beef replaced with fish
        • Make sandwiches open-faced
        • Rice replaced with quinoa
        • When ordering French fries, ask for unsalted fries
      • Condiments & Dressings
        • Croûtons replaced with almonds
        • Iceberg lettuce replaced with romaine or kale
        • Ketchup replaced with salsa
        • Mayonnaise replaced with mustard
        • MSG replaced with half-salt half-sugar mix with a dash of fish sauce
        • Salt replaced with Himalayan crystal salt
        • Soy sauce replaced with tamari sauce
        • Vinegar replaced with lime juice
      • Drinks
        • Beer replaced with root beer
        • Coffee replaced with cashew nut milk
        • Soda replaced with tea
        • Milk replaced with coconut, hemp or almond milk
        • Juice replaced with infused water or water
        • Sports drinks replaced with coconut water
    • Supplement your diet with other healthy additions
      • Apple cider vinegar increases your immune system strength
      • Drinking tea prevents stroke
        • Ginger or ginger tea maintains digestive health
        • Green tea reduces cavity risk, strengthens bones and strengthens immune system
      • Fruits increase metabolism and increase immune system health
        • Avocados lower cholesterol
        • Cherries reduce the risk of cancer
      • Legumes provide good fats that help with brain and heart health
        • Peanuts balance the blood sugar
        • Unsalted sunflower seeds reduce cholesterol level
      • Pizza decreases the risk of esophageal cancer
      • Vegetables, especially dark green and orange ones, decrease lung cancer
        • Broccoli balances the blood sugar
        • Cabbage decreases the risk of breast cancer and ulcers
        • Cranberry juice prevents bladder infections
        • Garlic lowers cholesterol
        • Habanero peppers improves blood flow
        • Horseradish root increases heart health
        • Onions lower blood pressure
        • Oregano or olive oil lowers blood pressure
      • Yogurt prevents yeast infection
  • Alcohol has some risks, especially when it’s excessively drunk
    • Risk of liver failure
    • Risk of oral cancer
    • Quitting alcohol is simply a matter of transferring your interests
      • Exercise to associate the pain of cravings with staying healthy
  • Tobacco has a number of risks
    • Smoking one cigarette interferes with the body’s healing ability for 2 weeks
    • Smoking cigarettes drastically increases the chances of lung cancer
    • Chewing tobacco increases the chances of mouth cancer
    • Nicotine withdrawal is difficult, but there are ways to curb it
      • Switch to a lousy brand of cigarette
      • Stop smoking after eating
      • Every time you get a craving
        • Lick a little salt with the tip of your tongue
        • Eat bananas instead
        • Exercise to release endorphins that decrease cravings
      • Go to a sauna 3 days in a row after stopping
  • Having a beard can actually help asthma sufferers and also will protect skin from the sun’s radiation

Some things aren’t good for your health despite their marketing

  • Fruit juice has much more sugar and far less fiber than eating fruits
  • Health supplements are mixes of unknown items
    • There is no law indicating what can or can’t be in them
  • Many drugs have unfortunate side effects
    • If the drug is an opioid, it’s addictive
    • If the drug is a painkiller, its results can be addictive
  • There is no cure-all food product that can fix ailments
    • Healthy dieting is about a balanced nutrition, not in having something specific
    • Gluten-free doesn’t matter unless you have the rare celiac disease
    • Fermented foods are not inherently better
    • Fat-free items are actually worse for you than sugar-free
      • The sugar industry blamed fat for obesity, and the marketing has never stopped
    • Excessive amounts of fat or protein will still cause weight gain and mess with the body’s system
  • Vitamins are useless for health
    • They’re dangerous if over-consumed
    • They can’t cure the common cold
    • Most of the effect of vitamins is the placebo effect

You’ll still suffer small ailments even when fully prepared, but there are ways to cure them

  • Allergies
    • Eat 1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
    • Eat yogurt
    • Eat honey from your local area daily
  • Asthma
    • Eat 1 tbsp apple cider vinegar
    • Eat marshmallows
    • Eat onions
    • Slow down your breathing
  • Arthritis/joint pain
    • Eat fish or take fish oil
    • Eat marshmallows
    • Eat pineapple
    • Rub aloe vera on the hurting joints
  • Brain freeze
    • Press your tongue against the roof of your mouth
    • Press your thumb against the roof of your mouth
  • Burnt tongue
    • Apply sugar to the burn
  • Canker sore/mouth ulcer
    • Put a chewable heartburn pill directly onto the sore for 1-2 hours
    • Wash mouth with baking soda mixed into water
    • Wash mouth with equal parts milk of magnesia and Benylin/Benadryl
  • Chapped lips
    • Dip a children’s toothbrush with soft bristles into Vaseline and scrub lips vigorously
    • Mix 1 tsp Epsom salts and 1 tsp pure maple syrup and apply to lips
    • Mix un-petroleum jelly and raw sugar and apply to lips
    • If the lips split, hold a damp black tea bag to the area
  • Congestion/stuffy nose
    • Eat chicken noodle soup
    • Eat garlic
    • Hold breath, bob head up and down repeatedly, then resume breathing
    • Have sex
    • Mix 1 tsp apple cider vinegar in water and drink
    • Push your tongue against the roof of your mouth and press your finger between your eyebrows for 20 seconds
  • Constipation
    • Drink senna leaf tea
    • Drink dried aloe vera juice
  • Coughing/cold
    • Drink thyme tea
    • Eat honey
    • Eat 1 tsp raw honey mixed with 1/4 tsp cinnamon
    • Eat oregano
    • Eat red peppers
    • Exercise vigorously
    • Gargle or drink pineapple juice
    • Lay on your stomach
    • Mix 2 lemons, 1/2 cucumber, 10-12 mint leaves in 3 quarts water, brew overnight and drink throughout day
    • Raise your hands above your head
  • Diarrhea
    • Drink apple cider vinegar
    • Drink a mix of a fiber product mixed into water
      • Fiber powder
      • Corn husks
      • Oats
      • Psyllium husks
    • Eat apples
  • Hiccups
    • Drink something while someone else pulls down on your ear lobes
    • Hold your breath and swallow 3 times
    • Inhale through your mouth, swallow saliva twice and slowly exhale through your nose
    • Masturbate
    • Try to force yourself to hiccup
  • Itches, bug bites and skin irritations
    • Use any anti-itch cream to tighten the blood vessels and reduce the itching for anything that irritates
      • Rub deodorant onto the itch
      • Apply baking soda mixed into a paste with water directly to the area
      • Apply a mixture of baking soda and vinegar
    • Place slices of raw potatoes on the skin, which will also heal blisters
    • For more severe issues like measles or chicken pox, take a bath with baking soda added
    • If earrings irritate your skin, put Vaseline on them before putting them in
    • For poison ivy
      • Rub liquid dish soap onto the affected skin, then rinse after letting it sit
      • Make a paste of baking soda and water and apply directly to poison ivy
    • Bug bites
      • Press a hot spoon onto the skin to break up the proteins that cause the itch
      • Make an X on the bite with your fingernails
      • Apply scotch tape or nail polish to the area
      • Mix 1 tsp Epsom salt with 1 cup boiling water, cool down for 20 mins, stir and place on bite
      • Mosquito bites
        • Apply soap or white-out to the affected area
        • Rub banana peel onto the bite
  • Migraines and general headaches
    • Bite on a pencil
    • Cut a lime in half and rub it on your forehead
    • Eat ginger
    • Eat a mint or chew mint-flavored gum
      • Eat fish or take fish oil
    • Massage the back of the neck on both sides
    • Put an ice pack or a bag of frozen peas at the base of the skull
    • Take short rapid breath
    • Drink something
      • Drink cinnamon tea
      • Drink ginger tea
      • Drink grape juice
      • Drink peppermint tea
      • Drink 2 glasses of Gatorage
      • Make a tea of 3 mint leaves, 1/2 cucumber, 1/2 lemon and 1 cup filtered water
    • Take a bath
      • Soak your feet in hot water
      • Take a bath with Epsom salt added
  • Nausea/indigestion
    • Drink something
      • Chai tea
      • Chamomile tea
      • Ginger tea
      • Mix a spoonful of honey into a drink
      • Mix 1 tbsp Epsom salt into 1 cup warm water
      • Mix 1/2 teaspoon of baking soda into 1/2 glass of water
      • For chronic indigestion, drink water consistently 30 mins before eating
    • Eat something
      • 15-20 almonds
      • Apple sauce
      • Bananas
      • Chicken broth
      • 1-2 grams ginger root
      • Oatmeal
      • Papaya
      • Plain yogurt
      • White rice
    • Lay on your left side and rub your stomach in clockwise circles
    • Run hot water onto a cloth or paper towel and wring out until damp, then place over the stomach
    • Apply a heating pad to the stomach
    • Smell rubbing alcohol
    • Carsick/seasick
      • Focus on an object outside your vehicle, such as the horizon or the scenery
      • Tilt your head from side to side
      • If you’re on a cruise, hang out in the pool, since the water will stay level
      • To avoid motion sickness in 3D movies, sit in the rear center of the theater
    • If you know you’re going to throw up
      • Squeeze the left thumb hard
      • Drink equal parts milk of magnesia and Benylin/Benadryl
      • Eat vanilla ice cream to prevent the burn from stomach acid
    • For painful gas, lay on your back and lift your left knee to your chest to fart it out
  • Need to pee
    • If it’s at a bad time, scratch on the back of the calf
    • If it’s at a bad time, think about sex
    • If you can’t pee, multiply random numbers in your head
  • Need to sneeze
    • Rub or press your tongue on the roof of your mouth
    • Tickle the inside of your nose with a feather or cotton
      • Remove the cotton on a cotton swab
  • Overheating
    • Hang a damp towel over an open window
    • Place an ice pack on the wrist
    • Run your wrist under cold water for at least 5 minutes
    • Wet paper towels, fold into ankle and wrist cuffs and wear
  • Parasites, worms and lice
    • To suffocate lice, apply mayonnaise or any other high-oil product
    • To remove worms and other parasites, eat honey with vinegar
  • Period cramps
    • Blend a smoothie of 8 oz fat free milk, 1 tbsp chocolate syrup, 1/2 banana, 1/2 cup strawberries, 1 kiwi peel and ice
    • Apply a heating pad to the affected area
    • Fart to relieve pressure
    • Masturbate with a tampon in to just touch it, then pee afterwards and change tampon to avoid bladder infection
    • Run hot water onto a cloth or paper towel and wring out until damp, then place over the cramp
    • Use a pad instead of a tampon or menstrual cup
  • Psychological pain
    • The brain connects pain with sight, so look away when an injury happens
    • If you can’t swallow pills, press your tongue against the roof of your mouth before swallowing
    • Needle stick pain
      • Put pressure around the area about to be stuck
      • Forcibly cough while the needle goes through
    • Pins and needles sensation
      • Rock the head side to side or stretch the neck
  • Shivering
    • Stick out your tongue
  • Small cuts, papercuts and razor cuts
    • Apply superglue to the cut
    • Lick them to speed up the healing process
    • Rub lip balm onto the cut
  • Something in your eye
    • Fill a bowl of water big enough for face and open your eyes in it
    • Grab your eyelashes and pull your eyelid down with your fingers, then blink rapidly several times
    • Pull back the bottom eyelid and wipe the inside of the eyelid with a clean finger
    • If eye drops hurt, run the bottle under hot water for a few seconds first
  • Sore/itchy throat
    • Drink something
      • Lemon tea
      • Mix 1/4 cup of vinegar and 1/4 cup of honey, then take 1 tbsp 6 times a day
      • Mix Jello like normal, but microwave for 30 secs and mix it with 1 tsp honey
      • Mix 2 tbsp honey, 2 tsp vinegar, 2 tbsp lemon juice and a dash of cinnamon in hot water
    • Eat something
      • Cucumbers
      • Marshmallows
    • Gargle something
      • Apple cider vinegar
      • Prepare a cup of tea, add a whole lemon’s juice and 1 tsp salt, stir and gargle, repeat 2-3 times a day
    • If your throat is itching or you have curds in it, scratch your ear
    • If you’ve lost your voice from a sore throat, gargle Tabasco sauce mixed with water
  • Spicy foods
    • Consume dairy products
      • Yogurt is more effective than milk
    • Eat a teaspoon of sugar
  • Splinter
    • Apply a paste of baking soda mixed with water, then wait 2-3 mins for it to pop out
    • Bottle technique
      1. Fill a wide-mouthed bottle with hot water nearly to the brim
      2. Press hand onto bottle tightly
      3. Wait for the suction to pull on the flesh and the steam to draw out the splinter
    • Pour a small amount of white glue over the area, let it dry completely and peel it off with the splinter
  • Sunburn
    • Eat tomatoes to prevent sunburn from ever happening
    • Avoid any further exposure to direct sunlight
    • Drink plenty of water to prevent dehydration
    • Gently rub it with vinegar to relieve pain
    • Treat it to let it heal faster
      • Don’t apply cold water or ice to a severe burn
      • Apply Right Guard men’s spray-on deodorant
      • Rub aloe vera plant sap over the burn
        • Make aloe vera ice cubes for especially bad sunburns
      • Place chilled cucumbers directly onto it
      • Rub Earl Grey tea bags onto it
      • Apply a paste of baking soda and water
      • Apply a washcloth of cold milk on the burn
      • Stir 2 tbsp Epsom salt into a cup of water, then put into spray bottle
        • Alternately, soak a clean cloth in it to apply it
    • If the burn is severe and blisters develop, seek medical attention
  • Tense muscles/muscle pain
    • Pinch and massage the fleshy part of the hand under the thumb
    • Rub olive oil into the skin
    • Use lavender soap in a bath
      1. Melt 10 tbsp finely grated Castile soap in a double boiler, stir frequently until smooth
      2. Crush 2 tbsp dried lavender flowers into a powder and mix with soap and 4 drops lavender oil, then store in a bottle
    • Neck/shoulder pain
      • Stretch arms behind head and behind back
      • Massage the tops of the shoulder blades
    • Back tension
      • Duct tape 2 tennis balls together and lay on them against the back
      • Massage it out with a tennis ball
    • Lower back pain
      • Change your diet to manage weight
      • Do low-impact exercise like walking, swimming and biking
      • Invest in comfortable shoes
      • Massage the lower back on both sides
      • Sleep on your side instead of your back
      • Spend less time sitting down
      • Stand straight with the shoulders pulled back
      • Stretch out your torso
    • Foot pain from standing
      • Invest in comfortable shoes
      • Put a pillow under the feet while sleeping
  • Toothache
    • Dip a cotton swab in mouthwash and bite down on it with the hurting tooth
    • Eat marshmallows
    • Rub ice on the back of the hand
    • Rub ice on the webbing on the back of the hand between the thumb and index finger
Next: Health 105: How To Cook